White Wash

Keep at least thirty dollars in your wallet along with proper identification.  There is never an instance where you can be too humble about your earnings.  Don’t look like a bum.  Press your pants and shirts to appear professional – like you have a job.  Wear a belt at all times, sagging signals you’re a hoodlum.  That or you’re open for anal sex or even worse that you’re someone’s prison bitch. Never let anyone tell you who you can be.  Do as you’re told to avoid conflict when in mixed company.  Reading Bukowski in public is never a bad idea.  Reading in public isn’t a bad idea.  Don’t read on the bus on the way to Mountainview, Fairview, or anywhere around Spenard – you don’t want to give off the impression that you’re better than they are.  Don’t be too intimidating.  Smile for Christ’s sake.  Firm hand shake.  Use your best voice and be confident in who you are!  Be charming: women like a man who knows what they want.  Know what you want and take it.  Find the love of a good woman.  Wear a condom.  Don’t become another uneducated black man with a baby.  Go sew your wild oats.  No one can love a black man like a black woman, leave the snow bunnies behind.  Don’t act like a nigger.  Carry your sheet music and your books in your back pack to keep them safe.  Don’t get caught walking around outside after dark and if you were really as smart they say you are don’t get caught walking on the wrong sidewalk.  Keep your hoodie off your head; you don’t want any strangers to shoot you for looking dangerous.  You want to be seen and to be seen clearly.  What’s in the case nigga?  So, you a band geek?  Play me some Hancock!  You know any Miles?  What…you think I don’t know who they are?  What?  I’m just some dumb nigger that don’t have ears?  Hey!  I’m talkin to you nigga! Always speak when spoken to.  If you have nothing nice to say you betta keep yo’ mouth shut nigga.  You are no better man than the company you keep.  Never forget where you came from.  Where I came from.  Where the father of your father’s father came from.  Remember your heritage.  Remember all those that came before.  We are all brothers in this struggle and we must fight just to survive.  Don’t hang around those boys.  You don’t want to be caught in the wrong crowd.  You think you better than us or somethin’?  You too good to sit down with the rest of us niggas?  Use your words and not your fists.  Why you talk white?  Ain’t you know you a nigga like us?  You IS a nigga…RIGHT?  Step to the beat of your own drum. Follow the music of your heart.  What the fuck you listenin to over there nigga?  Who is…Mog Why?  You ain’t got any Drake?  Wheezy?  Young Buck?  Ya DO know what RAP music is do ya?  Or do you white folk call it Hip Hop?  Always show respect for the police even if you know you’ve done nothing wrong.  Don’t ever be afraid to question authority.  Just don’t come off like the “angry black guy”.  What’s in the bag nigga?  Give it to me!  Books?  I don’t want no books!  Gimme yo’ wallet! Never leave home without your wallet.  I SAID gimme yo’ muthafuckin wallet!  Keep at least thirty dollars in your wallet…See this right here?  This shit right here is mine nigga!...along with proper identification.  Now bite the curb BITCH!  Just don’t act like a nigger.